Author’s Note:

All characters engaged in sexual situations are eighteen years of age or older. All characters and events are fictional. Any similarities with actual events or person, living or dead, are purely coincidental.

This is a work of fiction, and as such, certain events or situations may be improbable, and certain details may not correspond to real life. If you’re looking for strictly likely situations and exact reality, I suggest you skip this.

*****

Todd stared at the clock on the wall of the maternity ward waiting room. He wasn’t looking at it, just staring. His eyes followed the rapid jerks of the thin, red line on it’s face as it circled, and circled, and circled.

He was remembering when he looked at that same clock, and had to weigh the life of the love of his life against the lives of their babies. He had to decide, but he never had to hear those words.

“I’m sorry for your loss” echoed in his mind in time with the red line his eyes were focused on.

His family had changed. In the breadth of the time it took that line to move from a silent pause to the next, it had changed.

Todd had no experience to judge how it had changed. He had only the last year and a half to look back on. There had been so many jerks of that tiny, red line.

That exact red line moved, and his half-sister was gone, and so was his life. Another move and he was awake, trapped in his body. Another, and his sister was pregnant. Another and he could move. Another and his girlfriend became his sister, pregnant with his babies. He was sent home from the hospital, they told their parents, they got married, each event marked with a twitch of that tiny, red line.

Even those movements marking the seconds Thomas had impregnated Annette and Tyler, Zahra, had radically changed what he knew as his life, though the events themselves took place far away from Todd.

None of these monumental events influenced that red line. It continued to march around the face of the clock, steadfastly moving silently into the future.

At this moment, there was only that line, and the sobs of the woman next to him, his mother.

Where was Tyler?

Todd turned and looked at his wife, his sister. He had assumed from her silence that she had simply gone back to sleep, but he found her staring straight ahead, her face smeared with mascara by her steady flow of tears.

“Todd…” Kim moaned as she met her brother’s eyes.

Todd opened his arms and Kim crawled into his lap and buried her face against his shoulder.

Kim’s sobs joined her mother’s to fill his ears. He closed his eyes to stop the red line from moving, and there was only the sound of grief left.

Where was his brother?

His baby brother was somewhere, alone, in a new world. Like Todd had been when he first became aware he was alive.

“Where’s Tyler?”

Todd knew the voice. He had cataloged it, along with others, when there was nothing else he could do to organize his life. It belonged to his father. The man who had created the baby who Annette had died bringing into the world.

They were all linked through his father’s sperm to that baby, except for Tyler. Even his mother, through Todd and his sister, but not Tyler. Or Zahra.

Zahra… she was at home, caring for and protecting his daughters. He needed to go home.

Todd opened his eyes. His dad was standing in front of the chair he had been sitting in when those words were spoken – spoken almost nonchalantly, as if they wouldn’t change anything.

“Dad?”

Thomas seemed to be looking for something as his head swiveled on his shoulders from one side to the other.

“I need to find Tyler. He shouldn’t be alone.”

Thomas tried to take a step toward the door that had produced the man who spoke those words, but was tethered to his wife. Her hands refused to release their grip on her husband.

“Thomas…” Karen moaned.

Todd wanted to stand, but his sister was in his lap, clinging relentlessly to his neck. He slid forward in the chair, to the very edge, and straightened his legs under him.

Thomas turned and looked at Todd, now standing with Kim, her arms wrapped around him.

“We need to go home, Dad.”

Thomas nodded. Todd saw there had been tears on his father’s face.

“I’ll take mom. She’ll be with us. Find my brother, too.”

Thomas nodded again, then pulled his hand free from his wife’s grip and strode to and through the doors to follow the man who had said the words.

Kim and Karen passively let Todd lead them through the hospital while they clung to him. People passed, but seemed to not even notice the group, as if nothing traumatic had happened. Todd had been staring at the clock, but had no idea what time it was, but most of the people they passed in the halls were doctors and nurses, so he thought it was late. He knew what a hospital sounded like late at night.

He bundled up the women, his women, against the frigid cold outside, before leading them to the mini-van parked in the handicapped spot near the exit.

Kim’s bahis siteleri ‘just in case’ for removing the car seats turned out to be a good move. Todd put the women in the very back seats, so they could hold each other, and buckled them in.

Todd looked around the cockpit of the vehicle and hoped that one of the things he forgot he knew was driving. He pushed a button on the dash, and the engine growled and groaned in protest, but fired and ran after a second or two. It hadn’t wanted to start in the frigid night air.

He glanced in the rear view mirror, at the women behind him. They were huddled together, maybe sleeping, maybe just immovable with grief. He took a deep breath, swallowed the fear gnawing at his gut, and shifted into reverse.

Todd slowly maneuvered through the almost empty parking lot, following the signs directing him to the exit. The weather had cleared. The wind was now light, blowing feint wisps of snow across the black pavement.

He realized as he approached the public street that he had no idea which way to turn.

He had made the trip, from this same hospital to his home, innumerable times, but always as a passenger. Kim, Karen, even Thomas, had always been the drivers. There had been no reason for Todd to take note of, or even pay attention to, the route. He was certain this wasn’t something he knew but had forgotten he knew.

Todd braked slowly to a stop. The display in the center of the dash was showing the information about a radio station, but the volume indicator bar was blank. He scanned buttons nearby until he found what he was looking for: “Nav”.

A map appeared on the screen, with words across the top. He touched ‘Destination’ with his finger. Nothing happened. He touched it again, but harder, with the same result. Scanning the buttons on the dash again, he found one underneath the display marked “Menu” next to a panel that reminded him of his hospital bed remote.

He poked “Menu”, then used the arrow buttons to move to “Destination”, then to the option for “Saved Destinations”.

A short list of destinations appeared. Home, Hospital, Robbins, Washington… the final saved destination surprised him though. He had never been there, but apparently Kim had.

“Zahra,” Todd read the last entry out loud into the silence of the vehicles interior.

Todd’s phone broke the silence. He had a text from Thomas.

“Where are you?”

“Going home.”

“Who’s driving?”

“Me.”

“Stop!”

“No.”

“Where are you exactly?”

“A parking lot.”

“You’re driving?”

“I’m fine.” Todd lied. He couldn’t completely squelch his fear, but he had to ignore it.

“You’re not. You don’t drive.”

“Good night, Dad.”

Todd pressed the “Enter” button on the dash.

“In fifty feet, turn left,” a voice instructed from the vehicle speakers.

**

Todd turned in the driver’s seat to look at the women in the back of the vehicle. He could see the garage door closing through the back glass as he crouched beneath the vehicle’s roof and moved to the back.

“Kelly? Mom?”

Both women moved to sit up a little straighter in the seat. Todd unbuckled their seat belts. Kim reached her hand for her husband, and Todd helped her up and out the side door of the vehicle. Karen followed them.

Inside the kitchen, Todd removed the women’s coats and laid them on the small table with his. They offered no assistance, and Todd expected none. He was taking care of them, for a change.

They went first to one of the four bedrooms. Without hesitation, Karen walked to the bed and crawled onto it and curled up. Todd found a spare blanket in the closet and covered his mom with it after removing her shoes.

The twins moved together back down the hallway, turned and slowly walked to their closed bedroom door.

**

Zahra had sent Stephanie home hours ago. Her assistant had cheerfully helped, not just with their work that day, but with the girls, too. She had children of her own, now teenagers.

She had expected news from Todd or Kim. Something, at least a text letting her know something, anything.

The bedroom door opening roused her from her half sleep. She was in her friends’ bed, half listening for the sound of babies, and half sleeping.

“Shit,” she thought to herself, “this is going to be awkward.”

“Todd, you’re home!” Zahra gasped while clutching the blankets to her bare chest.

“Todd?” she whispered as she sat up in the bed, as much as her belly allowed.

Todd looked horrible. His face was ashen and his eyes were rimmed with red. As bad as Todd looked, Kim looked worse. Her face was smeared with tears and makeup, and her eyes were barely open. She moved stiffly beside her brother.

“How are the girls?” Todd asked in a hoarse voice, then cleared his throat.

“Sleeping. What’s wrong, Todd? Kelly? What’s wrong?”

“Annette…” Todd croaked, then covered his face with his hands and sobbed.

Todd had gotten them out of the hospital and safely home, but canlı bahis siteleri only because he had to. They were safe now, and Zahra was there. The grief, stress, and fatigue hit him all once.

“Oh my God!” Zahra moaned from the bed.

Todd was only vaguely aware of the sounds around him, and the arms of his friend as she hugged him, then pulled his sister into the hug. He felt his sister’s arm encircle his waist and her body shiver when she let out a long sob.

“Kelly, let me help you get in bed.”

Todd lowered his hands and looked at his sister. Zahra seemed to be moving in slow motion as her long delicate fingers worked the buttons of Kim’s blouse. He thought she was hugging Kim, but then his sister’s bra moved forward and down her arms and off.

Todd was barely aware that Zahra was completely naked as she undressed his wife, then led her to the bed and helped her in.

“Kim…” he whispered.

“She looks just like she did the first time I saw her naked,” Todd thought to himself. “Zahra loves Kim like I do.”

Todd watched his friend smooth Kim’s hair back along her head and kiss her forehead.

“Todd? Do you want me to help you get in bed?”

“The girls…” Todd mumbled.

“I’m here Todd. I’ll take care of them.”

Zahra’s fingers felt warm and soft against his as he fumbled with the buttons on his shirt. She pushed his hands down so she could do it for him, and he let his arms drop to his sides.

Todd watched as Zahra removed his shirt, then carefully pulled his pants down over his underwear. His mind was filled with grief, pushing everything else out. He wasn’t aware of himself as he pushed his shorts down his thighs as far as he could reach without bending.

Zahra knelt on the floor in front of Todd. She was going to lift his feet to finish removing his pants, but she stopped when she felt his movement. She raised her head, intending to look up at him, but she stopped before she could see his face.

Todd’s flaccid penis was inches from her eyes, surrounded by a cluster of curly blond hair. This was the penis belonging to the man she had wanted since the day she met him. He was so kind, so vulnerable, and oh so sexy.

She wanted to see him naked, but not like this. Not in this situation. She wanted him, but not like this.

Zahra gently lowered Todd’s underwear down his legs, then lifted one leg, and then the other as she slid the last of his clothing off.

“Come on, sweetheart, come to bed,” Zahra whispered.

Todd wrapped his arms around her shoulders and pulled her body to his, as much as her belly allowed, and sobbed against the top of her head.

Todd slept, maybe. If he did, it was fitful and erratic. He knew there were bodies in the bed with him, sometimes one, sometimes two, usually holding him while he held them.

He woke often, many times to find Zahra at the cribs. She was always naked, but that seemed normal in Todd’s mind.

A particular scene lingered in his mind. The dim light from the bedside lamp illuminated Zahra from the side, a baby nestled half in her arms and half against her naked, protruding belly, as she gently bounced on her toes.

“Zahra,” he had whispered to her. She turned and smiled. “Sh, go back to sleep. We’re fine,” her reassuring voice had drifted back to him.

**

Kim sat straight up in bed and squinted her eyes against the bright sunshine streaming in through the open curtains. She never opened the curtains in the mornings, and Todd knew better.

“Todd… please God, tell me it was a horrible nightmare.” She was crying again, or still.

“Kim…” Todd whispered and sat up next to his sister.

The twins held each other and cried.

The bedroom door opening, followed by the hint of footsteps on the carpeting, alerted Kim that someone else was there. Her memory from leaving the hospital until she woke up was vague, at best.

“Mom?” Kim asked, without letting go of her brother or opening her eyes.

“No, she’s still asleep, but I got her undressed and more comfortable.”

Kim let go of her brother and opened one eye to look at Zahra. She wasn’t naked, but she might as well have been. The tee shirt she was wearing might have been long enough to be enough, if she weren’t so pregnant.

“I didn’t know what you guys would want, so I brought coffee and orange juice. I guess I’ve never stayed until morning before.”

Kim was staring at her best friend’s clearly visible labia. She had been wrong in her imagination of Todd’s hard penis penetrating her caramel pussy. It was definitely chocolate, rich, dark, chocolate. Her pussy matched her nipples, and looked just as delicious.

Zahra set the drinks and cups on the bedside table and sat down next to Kim.

Kim wiped her face with both hands, smearing the makeup that hadn’t rubbed off on the sheets.

“The girls?”

“Fed, changed, and content.”

“Thank you, Zee.”

“Kelly, I love you. I love your husband. I love your babies. It’s what family does.”

Kim nodded. güvenilir bahis She couldn’t fathom that Annette was dead. The woman she had learned to treat as her mother over the past year, had died, giving birth to her baby brother, both pretend brother and real brother.

She turned and looked at Todd. He was lying on his back, an arm draped across his eyes. She bent down and kissed his lips, but he didn’t respond. He was asleep.

“He was awake for most of the night.”

“If you know that, you were too, then.”

“Yes, I was taking care of the girls.”

“We’re naked, and you might as well be…”

“Kelly, you and Todd slept, off and on, he more off than on, and I took care of your girls. I just happened to be naked when you came home and didn’t take the time to change.”

“Thank you. I love you, Zee. I really, really do.”

“I know.”

“You saw me totally naked?”

Zahra nodded.

“And Todd?”

She nodded again.

“I guess that cat’s out of the bag, finally.”

“I called Stephanie. She’s on her way. She thinks you’re my best friend from high school, by the way. I don’t think she’ll notice the five year age difference, since I look twelve without makeup.”

**

Tyler slowly became aware of his surroundings. It took him a minute to remember where he was, and why.

He opened his eyes without moving. The sunlight filling the room through the window told him it was daytime. He saw a man standing at the window.

“Thomas, where’s my wife?” Tyler asked gruffly.

Thomas turned slowly to face his best friend. To Tyler, he looked pale and gaunt as he crossed the space from the window to the bed.

“Tyler, Annette had a heart attack. They tried to revive her. They tried for a long time. They couldn’t.”

“What do you mean? She was having a baby. That’s all.”

“She had a heart attack having your baby. She died, Tyler. Annette is dead.”

“My wife died? Having… YOUR baby?”

“Your baby is alive. Annette had your baby, and he’s fine.”

“My wife, my Annie, is dead?”

“I’m so sorry, Tyler.”

“Oh my God, Annette is dead,” Tyler whispered.

“Annette is dead…”

Tyler stared at his hands, in his lap. Thomas may have been talking, or not. His wife was dead.

Thomas let his friend sit in silence.

“It’s my fault,” Tyler broke the silence.

“No, Tyler…”

“Yes it is. It’s my fault.”

“Why do you say that? How can…”

“So many reasons, Thomas… my God, so many things I did to deserve this.”

“Tyler, Annette had a heart attack. That can’t be your fault.”

“I was so angry… with you, with Annette, at Kelly for not being my daughter.”

Thomas didn’t know what to say, so he shook his head.

“I wanted to get back at somebody… Annette, mostly. I still loved her, but I was angry, so angry,” Tyler continued.

“It had been a couple months since, since finding out all this shit, but I was reminded of it every day. Annette was pregnant, with your baby. Of course I was going to be reminded.”

Tyler just sat and shook his head for a few minutes.

“Tyler?” Thomas whispered.

“I forgot my laptop and went back. She was there, when I turned on the lights she was just there, and naked, legs spread. I wanted to get even with Annette. I fucked her. She didn’t act like she wanted me to, but she didn’t stop me, and I fucked her. Then I told her to just forget about it. I was that guy. I was never that guy…”

Thomas couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Tyler cheated on Annette. But he, Thomas, had cheated on his wife, too. Thomas was surprised that he was surprised.

“Who, Tyler?”

“Zahra.”

Thomas felt like he was going to throw up. His best friend had fucked a girl that had been like family, until… until a couple of months after he made Annette pregnant.

“That’s why she isn’t around much anymore,” Thomas whispered mostly to himself.

Tyler nodded, still staring at his hands in his lap.

“I told myself that if I had to choose between Annette and the baby, I’d say screw the bastard and save Annette. I actually said that to myself. I said those words, ‘screw the bastard’, in my head, right before… … fuck! I said it the second before she died! How could it not be my fault!”

Tyler sobbed into his hands.

Thomas let his friend grieve until his sobs quit before he spoke.

“Tyler, your son will be ready to go home today.”

“I can’t…” Tyler whimpered.

“You can’t just leave him here.”

“You… you’re his dad. You take him home.”

“Tyler,” Thomas plead with his friend, “Annette wanted to have this baby, and raise him with the man she loved more than anything.”

“No. Take me home. We’ll come back and get him, but you’re taking him to your house.”

**

Zahra pulled her car to the curb and shifted into park. The afternoon was clear and sunny, but the air was cold, even for early February.

Tyler had opted for a simple, graveside service only. There were no friends; those had all been left back in Illinois, and the small group of family was gathered already at the grave site. Except for her.

She wouldn’t be joining them. She wasn’t going to announce to Tyler and Thomas that she was pregnant. Not like that. Not at the funeral for the wife of her baby’s father.